Monday – 10/3/2011

“Look not at the days gone by with a forlorn heart. They were simply the dots we can now connect with our present, to help us draw the outline of a beautiful tomorrow.”

It was another busy week for me, filled with a steady stream of enjoyable moments perforated with a few more bittersweet events. Following last week’s marathon schedule of speaking engagements and other obligations I was looking forward to a more relaxing week. That didn’t last too long. I quickly found myself immersed in another week filled with a flurry of activity.

Last Wednesday I headed to Metro Hospital for some follow-up x-rays to see how the rod in my neck was positioning itself since its awful snapping a few months ago. My mom drove me to my appointment and was able to drop me off outside of the hospital. Typically, I am usually met by someone at the entrance who will wait with me while she parks her car. However, I was feeling pretty adventurous and decided to venture out on my own and navigate the hallways and lobbies by myself. Before disembarking I had my mom place my insurance card under my hand, sandwiched between my palm and wheelchair armrest. I successfully survived my first solo adventure and made my way to the Radiology department and checked myself in. Technically, although I felt like a “big boy” out on my own, I was in a hospital surrounded by medical professionals in the event something would’ve happened. Nonetheless, I proceeded to have another round of x-rays taken, and then met my mother upon completion, who was waiting for me in the lobby. Together we headed over to meet with the neurosurgeon.

The appointment went better than I had anticipated. The doctor informed me that after some consultation with another neurosurgeon, he believes that the rods can be safely removed without having to replace them or add any further fusion to my neck. In fact, he believes I may possibly gain a few more degrees of lateral motion in my neck as a result of their removal. He even plans to remove the screws from the skull which may help decrease some of the intense headaches I frequently experience. The x-rays showed that the rods have shifted and the broken ends now overlap each other which explains the constant creaking and squeaking I hear whenever I move my head. Although this will entail another neck surgery, which always presents some risk, I am seriously considering moving forward with it. I am tentatively scheduled for early November surgery, however, I need to decide if I want to move forward with another opinion. At this point I’m not sure if a second opinion is necessary since the hardware can now be removed without needing to add any additional fusions.

When I got back to my place after the doctor visit, I grabbed a quick bite to eat and then headed out to see the movie, “Moneyball” with my friend, Eric, who was staying with me for a few days. Luckily there were only three other people in the theater, so we were able to find a seat. We both enjoyed the movie as it provided a lot of behind the scenes perspective and was based on a true story. After the movie we went back to my apartment to watch the final few games of baseball’s regular season. What an exciting finish! If you happened to watch the games last Wednesday then you know what I’m talking about. If you didn’t, then you probably missed the most exciting close to any sport’s regular season there has ever been!

Thursday arrived very quickly for me with a 7:30 AM wake-up. By 9 AM I was on the road headed to Toledo to meet with the folks and animals at Assistance Dogs of America. The visit allowed me the opportunity to work with a few of the dogs in training. I spent a few hours giving commands to three different Labrador Retrievers being trained as service dogs. Not only were the pooches incredibly intelligent, but they were very cute and loving! While I enjoyed working with all of them, there was a yellow lab named, Evan, who quickly found a soft spot in my heart.

After spending a few hours with the dogs, we headed over to meet Jeremy Bigelow, a quadriplegic who was injured last October. His family had learned of my story and reached out to me shortly after his accident. We have remained in close contact, sharing information and resources with each other over the past 12 months. I had the opportunity to meet his uncle, Mark, who came to hear me speak at the SCI Forum several weeks ago. However, this was my first time meeting Jeremy and his parents. We arrived at his home and quickly introduced ourselves and began sharing our “war stories” and successes with each other. He and his family were very accommodating and it felt like we had known each other for quite some time. Jeremy looked great and I can certainly appreciate all he has been through to get to the point he is at today. I am very proud of all the progress he has made and don’t doubt how much more progress he will still make!

I wasn’t sure how it would affect me to be back in Toledo, the city I spent over five years of my life living in. The place where I met, Kristy, and experienced some of the best times of my life. It was very bittersweet for me and I suppressed a lot of the emotions that overwhelmed and flooded my heart and mind like a broken dam. Driving through the city and looking out the window at so many familiar landmarks was oddly haunting yet comforting at the same time. There were so many things that I wanted to say, but had no one in particular I wanted to say them to, so I said them to myself. I found myself missing my friends, my “old” life and my wife. It was a very quiet ride back to Cleveland and I spent the two-hour journey home reflecting on how much my life has changed these past few years. It is still changing, everyday.

I was able to shake my funk once arriving back at the apartment later that afternoon. My occupational therapist-turned friend, Holly, was coming over for one last time before moving to Florida to begin a new job. I had promised her a sendoff dinner and my mom was kind enough to make us a cheese fondue complete with French bread, fresh apple slices, and broccoli for dipping! Holly and I enjoyed the French feast with some great wine and plenty of laughs well into the night. Although I have only known her since April, I will certainly miss our weekly Standing/Workout sessions and visits out and about town.

Friday arrived with plenty of rain and dreariness – a perfect day for a movie. Eric and I went and saw, “Contagion” at the theater and then stopped at the store and picked up groceries to make some homemade chicken noodle soup. It was a perfect comfort food to pair with the fall weather and evening football games on TV. Speaking of the weather, it has been unseasonably chilly this past week. My body has been feeling it, reminding me of how much it would benefit from a warmer climate. The good news is that it should warm up later this week reaching 80° by the weekend, assuming the current forecast holds true.

My Uncle Jim was in town Saturday and stopped by to watch the Ohio State game with my dad and I. On his way up from Columbus he made a pitstop at Corky and Lenny’s to pick up some corned beef sandwiches and plenty of pickles. The sandwiches were much more enjoyable than OSU’s performance. Jim was in town for Sunday’s Browns game which I also had tickets to. However, I made the difficult, strategic decision on Sunday morning to abandon plans to go to the game, opting to stay home and watch it on TV instead with Eric and my dad. It turned out to be the right decision 1) since the weather was awful, cold and wet, and 2) the Browns put on an abysmal display of what they called football. Staying home also allowed me to maximize my football watching with Eric, as well as enjoy one more afternoon and evening together. Eric left Monday morning, also for Florida, for a few months. He plans to be back in Cleveland early next year, and I am looking forward to seeing him again. We always have a great time together, regardless of what we find ourselves doing.

So now I am back to holding down the fort myself. I plan to get back to work finalizing all of the details that need to be addressed to make my nonprofit foundation a 501(c)(3) tax-exempt organization. I also need to get back on the FES bike and start working out my muscles again. Interestingly enough, a few people have commented that my arms look bigger these days. Not sure I agree with them, but I’ll take the news in stride and maybe it will provide me with a psychological boost!

Finally, I read some news this morning that the Miami Project is planning to begin human trials with Schwann cells, a certain type of stem cell that has shown promise in laboratory tests. Another sign of good news to get excited about, something to help fill the cracks in my brain between the exciting thoughts and bittersweet memories that jockey back and forth for prominent positioning among my conscious thoughts. Sunny days are ahead…

As always, I am very thankful for all the continued support and prayer I receive every day! Stand strong!

Scott