“This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad”
Today is July 3, 2010. It was exactly one year ago today that our lives and the lives of many around us were drastically altered. I can remember exactly what I was doing on that fateful day – I was vacuuming my carpets literally thanking God for all the blessings in my life and the fact that our family had been touched by very little tragedy. During the early part of 2009 I had lost several close friends and I was thinking about that and how truly blessed we were. Just like that – the phone rang and everything in our lives changed. As we continued to get the updates on the status of Scott, I remember that all I prayed for was that God would save his life and let him continue to be a part of ours. God granted my wish.
I am so proud of my intelligent, handsome, compassionate and loving son, Scott. It has been an incredibly difficult year for him in many areas, but he has fought with every fiber in his body and, although, he is not where he had hoped he would be at this time, he has accomplished so much and come such a long way and will continue to do so.
I have had a very difficult time dealing with Scott’s injury – it is now a year and I am not sure I have yet come to terms with it. I know it was a tragic accident and there must be a reason it happened, but I haven’t figured that one out yet and probably never will. I still have a great deal of emotional difficulty talking about the accident and accepting the fact that things are different for Scott right now. As a parent, you never think that something so devastating will happen to one of your children; they always seem so resilient and fearless; parents are the ones who should suffer before their children – I always thought that was the master plan.
I have spent as much time as possible with Scott over the past year – maybe even too much time. But suppose he needs his head scratched, his eyebrows scratched, his shoulders rubbed, his arms or legs straightened after a spasm – who will do it? What if all the care staff are at lunch with the other residents? Do any of us stop to think what if would be like to not be able to scratch our head or our cheeks or our nose or reposition our arms or legs – I certainly never gave much thought to that; now, that’s all I think about.
I don’t think I have cooked but three meals for Felix in all that time, and I have not been there for Lindsey when she has needed me. Both of them were greatly impacted by Scott’s injury and have each dealt with it in their own way. I often feel very guilty for not being there for them; however, at this point in time, I believe I am where I should be. I have tried to do whatever I can for Scott, but I know it is not enough. I haven’t been able to provide all the necessary people or equipment he needs to recover. I realize I can’t do it all myself and I have started to reach out to others. I need to be able to save some emotional support for Felix and Lindsey who have both suffered deeply over this accident.
We have all been blessed with the people that have come into our lives as a result of this injury. There are so many wonderful people that we would have never met under “ordinary circumstances”. All of us, but especially Scott, have truly benefitted by the Angels that God has sent our way – from our “chefs to our massage therapists, to our performing artists and their family, to the legal experts, to the clergy, to the web developers, to the volunteers, to all our family, extended family and friends. There is no way we could have gotten this far without your support, encouragement and financial help.
I want to once again thank each and every one of you for all your prayers and financial support. I plan on sending everyone an individual thank you note, but I have found it extremely difficult to start the process, but I will shortly. But please know that not a day goes by that all of us don’t think about the generosity that we have felt from all over the world!
With all that being said, we have only just begun to fight. I know I may sound naïve, but I still believe that Scott will accomplish all he intends to and then some. I don’t believe that he should give up on ANY of his dreams no matter how impossible they may seem right now. I think that he can still have whatever he wants – it might take some extra adjusting and will probably be expensive, but IT CAN AND WILL HAPPEN! We will do all in our power to support him, raise money, ask questions and get him the answers and resources he needs. He is worth it and deserves it! The most important thing we need to do first is get Scott out of the nursing facility and find him a home; he can still have his dream house – we just need to make some adjustments; then we need to get him a mini van as quickly as possible, find his care givers team and get him to a top rehab facility for Spinal Cord Injuries. The fact that Rae Ann has refused to give him therapy since May 7th is criminal, so the sooner he can leave, the better. Unfortunately, some of that is still out of his hands – the infamous words “Medicaid pending” have not yet been finalized.
So on this SPECIAL day we will CELEBRATE LIFE – Scott’s life as well as everyone else’s. We will drink champagne, eat fruit, tell stories and hopefully, visit with family and friends. If you find yourself in Westlake over the next several days stop by and celebrate with us. Let us all be thankful to God for what we have no matter what difficulties we might face as a result. I know the Fedor family is!!!
God Bless All of You
Bobbi Fedor