Wednesday – 10/24/2012

“Each experience through which we pass operates ultimately for our good. This is a correct attitude to adopt and we must be able to see it in that light.” – Henry Haskins

The clichés are endless when it comes to trying to seek solace or some sort of understanding from past experiences. A few of the classics most of us have probably heard at one point in our lives:

“Everything happens for a reason.” – Unknown
“That which doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.” – Nietzsche
“Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forward.” – Kierkegaard

I have no doubt that all of us could recite similar pearls of wisdom ad nauseam. Whether or not we choose to put any stock into the insight we rattle off and act accordingly because of it is an entirely different matter. We all have a past, previous experiences written and etched on the walls of the soul. Those experiences, emotional, mental, physical and spiritual, make us who we are. A conscious effort can be made to apply some learning from a previous occurrence and influence the choices we make in our future. Other times, individuals may be haunted by a prior happening they cannot escape from no matter how hard they try. There are cases where an individual is capable of repressing what has already happened, often times not without some type of psychological side effect. And there are those who refuse to learn from their past, destined to repeat the same mistakes. Regardless, we all have a past.

In the initial months following my accident, I probably spent the same amount of time wishing I could have a July 3 “do over” as I did dwelling on all the negative karma that had suddenly invaded my life. Neither of these activities offered anything constructive I could apply to moving forward in getting better. I was in a very unconstructive and destructive frame of mind. For me, it took a conscious effort to transition my outlook and perspective on life from a state of constant despair to hope to happiness. It didn’t happen overnight, but it did and it has made all the difference in my road to recovery. Of course not every day is a great day. We all still have bad days. In fact, in some weird way I don’t think it’s such a horrible thing to have bad days every now and then. But it’s extremely detrimental to consistently experience a disproportionate amount of bad days. So maybe, if done constructively, we can look to the past to create present happiness.

I vividly remember a business meeting I attended in Atlanta several years ago. Walking through the lobby of a building my eyes were drawn to a middle-aged woman with a large, bright orange button adorned to her blouse. It was nearly impossible to not notice her, as the obnoxious emblem she was wearing seemed to scream, “Hey everyone, look at me!” But what is impossible is for me to forget the message inscribed on her badge:

Be happy. Life is not a dress rehearsal.

However, I think in some ways our past can serve as a rehearsal for us when it comes to creating our happiness. Try to remember the happiest day/moments/period of time in your life. If you are able to recall this, then try to ascertain what it was that created your happiness – an event, a person or thing, or an attitude? Even if you think it was someone or something that made you happy, it had a direct effect on your attitude. The opportunity exists to re-create that attitude, even if you just have yourself to do it.

There is a great line in Vanilla Sky (one of my favorite movies) which takes place in Act One and is then repeated in the final scene:

Every passing minute is another chance to turn it all around.

Perhaps if we choose to put some stock in this and act accordingly, each passing minute might be the closest thing we ever get to a “do over” and an opportunity to find what it is that makes you happy.

Switching gears, I’ve added a few items to the Media page, one of which was a recent article featured in the University of Michigan’s “Dividend” magazine.

Finally, my heartfelt thanks to everyone in attendance this past Sunday evening at St. Joseph’s in Strongsville. Your prayers, support and overwhelming generosity greatly moved me! Thank you!

Stand Strong!

Scott